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Features | Experience of the Divinity of Bhagavan by Devotees | Group VI | Ms. Supraja G

Ms. Supraja G, II M.Sc.,
Sri Sathya Sai Institute of Higher Learning,
Anantapur Campus.

Ms. Supraja G, a student of the second year M.Sc. of the Sri Sathya Sai Institute of Higher Learning, Anantapur Campus narrates her experiences of the Divinity of Bhagavan in her own words.

'In the year 1997, I went to Kodaikanal for Swami's darshan. By 1:30 p.m., the lines for evening darshan were already formed. The climate was very pleasant, and I was standing in the line after almost a hundred people. After waiting for an hour or so, we were allowed to enter Sai Sruthi - Swami's residence at Kodaikanal. Some sevadal guided us into the mandir premises, and I found myself sitting in the second row from the carpet. My cousins and Samithi members were also with me and all of us wrote letters to Swami. I wanted to have the fortune of His sparshan and so I calculated that, if not a padanamaskar, I would be able to get His touch if I gave my letter in a particular way. I was very confident that He would take my letter.

Bhajan started, and the beautiful form of Swami with an enchanting smile on His face came into our view. He entered and started walking on the carpet. I could almost hear my heart beat, and I prayed that He should take my letter as well as bless me with His sparshan. Swami came right in front of me. I stretched my letter as planned, with my hand covering most parts of it so that when Swami accepted the letter, I could snatch a touch of the tip of His fingers. He gently smiled and I was lost. He skilfully held the corner of the letter, and drew it from my hold even as my castles of expectation crashed! By the time I realized the fact that I was not able to get the gift of sparshan, He was sitting on the throne enjoying the bhajan. I had to satisfy myself with only His darshan. However, the desire for sparshan and, if possible, sambhashan lingered in my mind.

That year during the summer holidays, my mother and I went to Prasanthi Nilayam for seva. Swami was in Brindavan then. After service, all the sevadal and pre-sevadal went to Brindavan for Bhagavan's blessings. Swami asked us to sit in rows leaving gaps for Him to come. We were excited at this unexpected blessing from Him. The most compassionate Lord walked slowly and gracefully to each line of devotees. My younger sister and I were thrilled at the prospect of having padanakaskar, and joyfully touched His tender Lotus Feet with both our hands. As He was proceeding, I bent forward and tried to catch His attention forgetting that He is the Lord of the Universe. He turned, looked into my eyes and, with a smile hidden in His face, told me in Tamil 'appadi panna kudadu (you must not do like that).' I had asked for His sparshan alone, but He had blessed me with His darshan, sparshan and sambhashan. Nevertheless, a trace of dissatisfaction crept into my heart as whatever He had spoken was a bit of chastisement. On brooding over the matter, I felt that I should earn an occasion when He would speak to me more pleasant words.

On May 31, 2001, I stepped into the Swami's Institution to pursue my undergraduate course. The best thing that happened to me there was being selected for the band. I thought that this would be my opportunity to work towards perfection, and win His blessings. Honestly, I even secretly hoped that my long-felt desire for a 'pleasant' sambhashan with Swami would somehow be fulfilled now.

One early morning, I dreamt that Swami had come in a white car to the western gate of Prasanthi Nilayam where we did practise band everyday. As I did not then believe in dreams, I just overlooked it. However, I told my band group about this. But as we were practising, we heard that Swami might come that way. We enthusiastically waited, but nothing happened. Swami had reached the mandir already. I then concluded that dreams are just the outcome of our desires.

But exactly after one hour, a sevadal informed us that Swami was indeed coming there. After one disappointment, this time I was not at all excited, or even happy. But the white car came exactly the way I had seen it in my dream. Swami was seated in the front. The car stopped in front of me, and I was overwhelmed to find myself standing on the same side. I mustered some courage, and called out to Him. He lowered the windshield, looked at me and said 'amma?' I said 'Swami, we want to play the band for You.' Swami said 'play.' I asked Him 'Swami, when.' He told us to play then itself, and patiently listened to our half-prepared tunes. Then He lovingly advised us to eat well and practise. On that particular day, many of us including me had not taken breakfast!

Finally my all wishes came true. And the gifts of Darshan, Sparshan and Sambhashan gave me a bigger gift - Devotion.'

-- Ms. Supraja G

(As extracted from the souvenir Ananta Prematarangini published by the Anantapur Campus of the SSSIHL on the occasion of the 80th Birthday of Bhagavan)